Mailbag for July 12, 2024
Sharing thongs, on Tom, Katie, and Nicole, Brad Pitt's kids and his PR machine, where films for woman are, the media's handling of Lily Allen, and Sprint-ing for sports docs
Dear Squawkers,
I’m writing this on Thursday afternoon. PEOPLE just posted a story about Ben Affleck being papped without his wedding ring on. Jennifer Lopez, meanwhile, was seen bike riding with Loren Ridinger in the Hamptons, ring on.
Will something have happened by the time you read this?
Their wedding anniversary is on Tuesday. Will there be, um, something to celebrate on Tuesday? It’s looking bleak, and it’s been bleak for a while. Bleak is pretty much almost everything these days. Which only adds to my confusion and frustration about why some corners of the pop culture audience couldn’t just enjoy this gossip gift the second time around. We almost never get this kind of sequel, what’s wrong with us that we can’t just fucking appreciate it?
Anyway, let me continue in this Thursday-not-yet-Friday blindness and move on to a question I’ve been saving since earlier this week and it’s related to something that happened on Love Island USA but you don’t have to watch the show to participate in it because the question doesn’t have anything to do with the storylines and the couples, it has to do with lingerie. I’ll give you the basics.
On Love Island there’s a space called The Hideaway. At some point during the season, producers will send a couple into The Hideaway to get away from all the other islanders at the villa and spend quality time together. By quality time I mean fucking, obviously.
This week, Nicole and Kendall were sent into The Hideaway. The way it works is that they’ll get a text from producers informing them that there’s going to be a Hideaway night and then all the girls will squeal and run upstairs to the dressing room to get her ready and all the boys will fist-pump and slam their chests together and run up to the bedroom and be dudes about it. Very heteronormative and not my favourite part of the show. The Hideaway, to me, is mostly boring.
Back to the girls and my question. So Nicole’s picking an outfit for The Hideaway and of course it’s lingerie and all the other girls are offering to lend her THEIR lingerie options for the occasion and this is where I’m like WTF, is this a thing? I don’t wear regular cotton underwear, do not own a single pair of underwear, I live a free-pussy life, and that extends to lingerie, so maybe I’m not up to date on lingerie habits…
Is there a world out there in which women are wearing each other’s lingerie?! This would be a problem for me, even if the garments were laundered. Some things, in my opinion, should not be shared. Keep in mind, your girl won’t even go camping because of the whole living outside thing, it’s too dirty, and I can’t with a public shower, so it could just be my ultra-particular princess ass but, like, I really do need to know if you’d be down with wearing someone else’s clean thong. Let me take this to a poll.
Now that I’ve asked my question, let’s get to yours.
Question from Phyl: I’ve always wanted to know how Nicole Kidman coped when not having her adopted kids with Tom Cruise close to her. If he dies before her is the NDA null and void? Same with Katie Holmes. I hope they both write books. Also, how are we feeling about Nicole and Naomi Watts rekindling their friendship? Was there ever really any distance between them? The new Instagram ad for Stripes features them along with Kerry Washington and a few others I couldn’t identify, all dressed in black and white. Très chic. It’s giving menopause x Swans. Anyway, a good use of the series’ visuals to promote the products.
Lainey’s Answer:
Nobody really knows anything about the divorce agreements between Nicole Kidman, Katie Holmes, and Tom Cruise. I mean there’s been a lot of speculation, but it’s only been speculation because neither woman has ever gone on record to talk specifics about ending their marriages. That said, so many people believe that story about how Katie agreed to a clause in the settlement to not date in public for five years – and this came up when she and Jamie Foxx were together. Important to note, however, that that rumour was started by Radar Online, not exactly a reliable outlet. So for our purposes, again, nothing about the terms of both divorces is really slamdunk information. Just wanted to put that out there before I share my theories. My biggest theory is that there’s a connection between Nicole and Katie specifically related to custody.
Nicole left that marriage and has very, very rarely been seen with her children, Isabella and Connor. Katie left her marriage and, as a result, Tom is never seen with his youngest child. That could be a Scientology thing because something something cult cult, you can’t associate with anyone who isn’t a believer. Which looks like shit on him. But the other part of it could also very possibly be that Katie reflected on what happened to Nicole and how her kids “chose” to stay with Tom after they split. As famous as Nicole was, at the time, she was still not as famous or as powerful or as wealthy when she quit Tom. It’s likely that she did not have the same resources – this was 2001, a lifetime ago. It’s impossible to overstate what a big fucking deal Tom Cruise was in 2001 and also, as a society, we weren’t talking about women and power imbalances the way we are now. Remember those now iconic photos of her leaving her divorce lawyer’s office when it was finalised?
Look at the relief on her face. She has said that she will never talk about that marriage, the struggles, and what really happened. But these pictures definitely give us some insight into how difficult those divorce negotiations must have been. And what she must have experienced in securing her freedom.
So to go back to Katie, with Nicole’s example to learn from, this is why she had to turn herself into a ninja, to protect herself and more importantly her child, and her relationship with her child, when she made the decision to get the fuck out of Xenu.
As to your question about how Nicole coped with not being able to spend time with her kids and all that heartbreak, I don’t think we’ll ever know. But there are times when I watch her performances where I think that’s the closest we’ll come to it. She’s been known in some of her roles to go Method (without turning into a total asshole like Jared Leto) and I thought about this a lot seeing her as Celeste in Big Little Lies. In season two, when she tells her mother-in-law, Mary Louise (played by Meryl Streep), that “You’re not getting my fucking kids!” … I felt that. The way I interpreted it, she was working through her anger, the pain, the resentment, and the FANTASY of being able to fight for her kids through her character.
In real life, presumably – because again, how can we know – it’s a lot more complicated. It’s not just the legal system and money, it’s also her kids and their own intentions, what they say and think that they want, what influences they may or may not be under.
So, to the second part of your question about NDAs and whether or not she and Katie would ever write a book or tell-all, girl, I want that as much as you do, for the gossip, always. But in this case, I’m not sure the gossip would serve the kids. Suri Noelle (which is reportedly what she goes by now) has already had to live a whole life, 18 years, with literally everyone knowing her business. But all we see of Suri is the occasional pap photo. If she has a finsta or a secret TikTok or Snap, she’s careful about it. She’s not out here wanting to be discovered, which tells me that she wouldn’t want her ma putting her on blast when her father expires. If her father expires. I don’t know what they’re doing over there in that Church but the way it’s looking, that man is running and jumping and climbing his way to immortality by unlocking whatever alien essence is inside of him. Imagine if Tom Cruise is still alive in a hundred years and we finally realise, oh shit, that Scientology mess was legit all along?
Speaking of dads whose children want nothing to do with them…
Question from Patty: Brad Pitt's movie does not come out for awhile, why all the articles about his relationships with his kids? His people keep talking to media outlets, why draw attention to the fact that it seems his kids really want nothing to do with him. Just think that he does not need to respond to every article about his kids not using his last name.
Lainey’s Answer:
PEOPLE had an exclusive this week about how has he has “virtually no contact” with his adult kids and that “his engagement with the younger kids is more limited in recent months because of his filming schedule," and I’m assuming this might be one of the articles you’re talking about?
You’re right in that it’s only drawing attention to the fact that his kids do not fuck with him, but at the same time, it’s also such a bad look that his kids are out here dropping his name literally as soon as they’re legally able to do so, that I assume he and his team want to maintain as much “himpathy” as they can, especially since one of the first sightings of him since the news about Shiloh’s name change and the way Vivienne listed her name in The Outsiders credits was him looking all smug and stupid at the British GP as he hard-launched his relationship with Ines de Ramon. They walked through the paddock in front of all those cameras and the crowd.
Two days later, sources are talking about how sad he is about his kids at PEOPLE.com. The way I see it, that PEOPLE exclusive was intended, in part, to offset whatever juxtaposition would come up with him, now 60 years old, all loved up with a 31-year-old woman, just as two of his daughters made decisions about how they wanted to be known in the world. That’s five out of his six kids basically choosing identities independent of him. And, of course, it has been years, FUCKING YEARS, since he’s been seen with any of them. Not one goddamn photo. NOT ONE.
But depending on where you are and what you read, this works for him. There are still a lot of people out there convinced that this is Angelina Jolie’s fault and that he’s a victim of her machinations. You know, believe children… unless their dad is a white and successful movie star with a great plastic surgeon. Those people will read articles like this and tilt towards him – it’s so sad that he can’t see his kids, he’s doing the best he can, he’s been so patient even though she’s treated him so unfairly. Do not underestimate misogyny. Look what it can do all the way up to the White House. This is the angle that Brad Pitt is working.
Question from Alix: For Sarah - why don’t cinemas & movie studios want my money? I’m in my early 40s and can’t seem to find a single film to entice me to the cinema and I want to go! One of my best friends and I love watching movies together, and more than that we love going to the cinema together. In our 20s & 30s we would go multiple times a month, despite rising prices. We’re not very discerning viewers, we’re happy to see an entertaining B movie. But we just can’t find anything. For context, we live in a medium sized town with 1 multiplex & 1 IMAX (but they tend to show the exact same thing). I think the last film we saw was Barbie…And in 2024 we have been actively seeking something to watch. All we want is to sit in a dark cinema, eat crappy food & cackle away. But everything seems aimed at old bros, or young bros, or grandfathers, or gen z or gen alpha. When we last discussed it, I made a horrific suggestion - maybe we’re too old for the cinema? So where are the films for women? Why don’t cinemas & movie studios want my money?
Sarah’s Answer:
“Where are the films for women” is one of the oldest questions in the show business book. When I first started writing for LG, I would cover the burgeoning efforts to increase diversity on screen and I would point to study after study after study that shows diversity is good business, but it’s like we just keep forgetting that lesson. Then Barbie comes along, and everyone remembers that women like going to the movies, too. Or Crazy Rich Asians, Black Panther, or a faith-based film—people act consistently shocked when films aimed at underrepresented, underserved audiences turn into hits, as if there aren’t people starving to see themselves on screen. It’s truly frustrating to be in the same place we were FOURTEEN years ago. When I started at LG I was in my 20s and now I’m getting wrinkles lasered off my face and yet I am STILL writing about the SAME shit.
Sorry, that’s not your problem, Alix, but I hope we can all see that “where are the films for women” is a tired ass question and SOLELY because the MEN in charge of Hollywood refuse to answer it. (Yes, I know Donna Langley runs Universal, but she’s the only one.)
However, can we dig a little into “we’re not discerning viewers” and “we just can’t find anything”. Alix, I think you might be more discerning than you think, because while it isn’t always widely advertised, there IS stuff to see that isn’t brocentric. Just this weekend, July 12, brings the following films to theaters:
Longlegs – crime/horror/thriller starring Maika Monroe and Nicolas Cage, from filmmaker Oz Perkins (son of Anthony), who also made the exceptionally creepy The Black Coat’s Daughter. Monroe stars as an FBI agent trying to stop a serial killer. Comparisons to Silence of the Lambs are a BIT much, but it’s a solidly scary movie.
Fly Me to the Moon – The ScarJo and CTates NASA rom-com. I didn’t get to screen this one, but reviews are more good than bad, and it does look really cute.
National Anthem – I’ll have a full review of this on the site later this afternoon, but it’s a sensitive drama about finding your people set in the world of queer rodeo. A heartfelt and deeply lovely film.
Dandelion – Kiki Layne stars as a struggling singer-songwriter who falls into an unexpected romance. Original music from Aaron and Bryce Dessner (review coming next week).
That’s a horror movie, a rom-com, and two dramas, three distinct genre options, even amidst the summer blockbuster season. I’m not sure how you qualify “films for women”, but the four I just named all have female/queer protagonists, and two of them are in a genre traditionally aimed at women (romance). Also, Thelma and Maxxxine are still in theaters. If you live in a medium-sized town with a multiplex/IMAX, at least one of these films will be playing in your area. There ARE things to see, you just have to go see them. There is definitely a problem with who has greenlight power in Hollywood and what movies get made, but there is ALSO a problem of audiences not turning up for the films they say they want to see.
Question from Beatrice: In her podcast Miss Me, Lily Allen has been very candid about stuff celebs rarely talk about. She's talked about sharing finances with David Harbour, losing her home after failing to account for a very large tax bill, and her harrowing time dealing with a stalker. Yet all the media has chosen to focus on are clickbaity articles about her thoughts of Beyoncé and nepo babies, which I find uninteresting and shallow when the real story is clearly elsewhere. Why is that? Is this a case of bad gossip?
Lainey’s Answer:
Yes and… no…and more. In the case of what Lily Allen said about Beyoncé, well, first of all, Beyoncé is always going to make headlines, right? Like I don’t know that we can blame the media on this because anytime anyone says anything about Beyoncé, it’s going to be a story. And in Lily’s case, I’ll say this generously, she didn’t choose the right words when assessing COWBOY CARTER and “Jolene”. I’ve listened to that part of the episode, and I agree with the criticism that Lily was basically questioning Beyoncé’s approach to country music while then revealing that she herself is working on a country album, LOLOLOL.
That said, you’re right, she has also revealed other interesting details that celebrities don’t often get into. I love the money talk and it’s super insightful to hear her discussing how she and David Harbour manage their finances and how she was unprepared to deal with the realities of having a lot of money but not a lot of financial guidance. If Duana and I were doing a Show Your Work podcast, we’d be all over it. In this situation, yes, I think the media could do more to amplify what she’s sharing but also, I wonder if the audience could be more interested, too.
Flaunting money is sexy but is talking about how you keep your money and split your money and protect your money sexy? To me, yes. To TikTok? I think you know the answer to that. Collectively, as a society, especially in the west, getting real about money is still uncomfortable. In the workplace, we’re still encouraged by our bosses to not talk about money and salaries with our colleagues – and you know who that benefits. Spoiler: not the employees.
For women, especially, there are deeper implications. I don’t mean to put on my pink pussy hat and get off femme ragey here, but it certainly doesn’t serve misogyny if women become more literate about money – and that involves talking about it and understanding it. And this hits on my theme about gossip in general. How gossip reveals more about us than the people we’re gossiping about. This is a great example. Is it bad gossip? Yes. Why is it bad? Because it is exposing our social aversion to gender equality on so many levels, including financial discourse.
Question from Tracy: Netflix is dropping some fun content leading up to the Olympics and Sprint is a fun watch. Of course, I immediately become invested in the athletes, and I defo will be watching the men's and women's 100 & 200. I feel like sports reality is coming into its own and way more interesting that housewives style reality. Real drama, rivalries, success and failure. Do you think there is more to come? Will they keep producing sports programing? Ashton Eaton (Olympic 2x gold medalist) says the track community mostly hates on Sprint but those new to the sport love it.
Lainey’s Answer:
We just started Sprint this week, we’ve watched three episodes so far, trying to pace ourselves, no pun intended. I LOVE it. Sha'Carri Richardson is such great TV! And also, seriously, fuck those colonisers in England with how they’ve treated Zharnel Hughes.
If you’re a regular at LaineyGossip, you probably know that I love a sports doc. This year marks the 15th anniversary of 30 for 30 and one of the new films as part of their anniversary package is I’m Just Here For The Riot, which is about how the city of Vancouver set itself on fire after the Canucks lost to the Bruins in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup finals in 2011. Jacek and I went to that game, and I’ll never forget the way he dragged me out of the arena. I was all pouty trying to stay in my seat and watch the Cup presentation and he was basically, no, we have to move now, because I know my city. Luckily, we parked close, on the street, and I’m not exaggerating when I say that when he pulled out of our parking spot, I could see the smoke already in the rearview. We were so lucky that Jacek was on it and got us out early and safely.
American Son is also one of the new 30 for 30 films that ESPN is releasing and it’s about Michael Chang, directed by Jay Caspian Kang whose writing I have long admired. I can’t wait for this one.
I’m mentioning the 30 for 30 series and ESPN because many consider them to be the gold standard of sports docs. (Ken Burns’s Baseball docuseries is also gold standard but he doesn’t specialise in sports the way ESPN does.) Speaking of gold standards… The Last Dance. The Last Dance would have been a hit whenever it came out but god was it a gift in 2020 when we were at home, just a couple of months or so into COVID, all of us totally shellshocked by lockdown. And it really did feel at the time like so many of us were watching it at the same time and talking about it at the same time and connecting, right?
Episodes of The Last Dance aired on ESPN in the US and then the next day on Netflix for international viewers. Netflix is where it lives now, in addition to many of the 30 for 30 titles, as part of their sports library. Your question was will they keep producing sports programming? Well, they’ve BEEN producing sports programming.
There’s so much of it – Beckham, Quarterback, (which I haven’t watched yet), Naomi Osaka, Cheer, and more.
Full Swing is the Drive to Survive of golf. Break Point is for tennis. Tour de France: Unchained is for cycling. Sprint is for track. All of these series come from the same producers, Box to Box Films. You mentioned what Asthon Eaton said about Sprint and the track community hating it? Well, Mercedes and Ferrari did not participate in season one of Drive to Survive. But guess what happened in season two? Sprint is currently one of the most watched new shows on Netflix and it’s probably going to pick up even more momentum as we get closer to the Olympics. It’ll be interesting to see if the track community changes its mind.
Finally…
Congratulations to Josephine W of London, England and Margherita L of York, ON for winning our Bridgerton draw from last week’s mailbag. Thank to all of you for subscribing, we’ll have more of these in future.
Keep squawking and keep gossiping,
Lainey and Sarah
I am commenting on this like 9 hours after everyone else so it will probably be unread, BUT: speaking as a person who has observed families her whole life, and also speaking as a mother, I don't believe Angelina Jolie, or any parent, can successfully alienate her children (who were not infants) from their father without the children having very good reason to want distance in that relationship. I don't even like saying "alienate" because it implies that a dastardly plan was afoot.
Generally speaking, kids want to love their parents. Your parents are your most primal relationships and you are hardwired to want to have some kind of relationship there. If these kids don't want anything to do with him, that didn't just happen because their mom told them to. Their father did something deeply painful, and I would guess repeated whatever that was again and again during a long period, for those kids to decide they don't want anything to do with him. They were old enough to have had years with him; you don't just end a parental relationship easily.
Last year Lainey did a Squawk piece on her Botox routine before a film festival. I want to hear about Sarah’s laser treatments! This is a throwaway sentence that I want to know more about!!